josie turned 2

January 12 was a momentous day! Josie turned two, can you believe it? She's growing up and leaving behind the baby stage. It's always sad to say goodbye to the baby stage, but oh so fun to explore what lies ahead as kids develop into their own little people.

Her birthday started out with a magical dusting of snow! It was very pretty, though it seemed to throw all of St. Louis to a halt. We didn't mind one bit.

Because Josie had an outpatient procedure scheduled, she wasn't able to eat anything but she could have clear fluids till 9:30 am. So she had all the apple juice she could possibly handle! Fortunately, she tends to be a light eater in general, so she really didn't complain much. I just kept her distracted and her crazy sagging diapers changed.

After all the hospital stuff I mentioned in the previous post, which was an unfortunate part of the birthday extravaganza, we were pretty pooped out. Josie had a mega nap (she had partial anesthesia and pain meds that made her sleepy.)

At dinnertime, we celebrated with Grandma and Grandpa as well as Dillon Neely (who is living with us until he and Rebekah get married in March...Josie is nuts about Dillon and actually says his name which, in my opinion, gives him rockstar status) and ate some of Josie's favorite foods (and when I say favorite, I mean, stuff that she'll actually ingest. It had to involve ketchup.) We had mac and cheese, hot dogs, and salad, the ultimate kid meal. I couldn't stand to feed this meal to the grown ups, so we had a slightly "higher brow" version...browned apple chicken sausage with kraut to dress it up. (I don't know why, but I just love sauerkraut and took this as an opportunity to inflict it upon others.) Topping it all off were chocolate cupcakes with chocolate butter cream frosting and ice cream. (I can hardly bear to think of how many calories were in these little suckers, but I'm glad they're finally out of my fridge!) This year, she loved the cake. Last year, she didn't bother. So that was definitely a step in the right direction!

 

We sang the birthday song to her and she surprised me by getting a bit quivery in the lip. Not sure if it was because the lights were turned way down or if she got overwhelmed and confused. But she's not usually very shy about being the star of the show. Regardless, she totally knew what to do about the candles!

Then she opened presents which, again, she knew exactly what was expected of her coming directly off of Christmas just weeks ago. She got some cute clothes and shoes from us and a great kitty cat piano with a microphone and the most wonderful meowing sound effects! Of course, we all know that anything musical will thrill Josie.

All in all, it was a wonderful day, a real success I think. I just can't believe she's two. But I think two will be a very good year for her. I'm looking forward to getting to know more about her as she reveals more of who she is!

Not much else to say, but just feast your eyes on this sweet little girl who thinks she's so big, she should wear lipstick now!

the back story

January 12 was Josie's big birthday. And that's what I really want to post about. But there's a lot of behind the scenes information that you need to know. It was full of happy moments, and also, not-your-normal kind-of-birthday moments. I haven't posted anything about some of the health stuff that's been going on with Josie over the last several months because, I guess I just didn't feel up to rehashing all the details. It's a long story and frankly, I'm at a time right now where I just don't like sitting in this computer chair for very long! So, as a back story before we get to the birthday fun, I'll fill you in on the details of what we've been dealing with.

But to start, here's a fun picture of Josie just before her birthday. The angel hair is in full fluff mode!

It's hard to get a crisp image of this little mover and shaker!

Sometime around mid August, I noticed some swelling around Josie's left ankle. She didn't act like it hurt, she walked normally and so I thought I must have missed her twisting it or something. But three weeks later, the swelling persisted. Over the next several months, we went through multiple pediatrician appointments, several rounds of xrays, and a trip to a pediatric orthopedist who ordered further xrays and an ultrasound. No one seemed too alarmed, though a bit puzzled and we left the ortho with no real answers and plans for an MRI in order to see more detail around the ankle. This was the week just after Thanksgiving.

Two days later, Josie woke up in the night with pain, further swelling in the ankle and a mild fever. She couldn't get comfortable to sleep and was unable to stand or walk. It was a quick and alarming turn. Honestly, seeing her try to stand only to crumple to the floor was a heartbreaking scene.

The following day was spent in the ER doing more xrays, bloodwork and she had to fast from all liquid and food in case they ordered the MRI. It was a sad and difficult day for her, and for us, but I was hopeful that at least by the end of the day, we'd have an answer to what was causing the trouble.

But that didn't exactly happen. They ruled out all the really scary things like cancer, lupus and a "septic joint" and said that they suspected arthritis (this was one of our earliest questions we'd had since Bryan's youngest brother had juvenile rheumetoid arthritis. Doctors kept dismissing that idea since it's somewhat rare to see it in kids this young as well as without any other symptoms.)

We've met with arthritis specialists and the Juvenile Rheumatoid Arthritis diagnosis is nearly certain with them, though I haven't quite "embraced" it yet...I am interested in investigating any dietary sensitivities that might cause arthritis symptoms and meet with a homeopathic practice in a couple of weeks...more info to come later, I'm sure.

So.....anyhow....all the backstory to say that, on her birthday, Josie was scheduled to receive a cortisone (steroid) shot in her ankle to decrease the swelling so that we could relieve any pain for her and also get her off medication. The doctors said that half of their patients who are only affected in one joint will receive this shot and never have any further issues. So that's what we are praying for!

The people at Children's Hospital are so great and had birthday balloons for Josie as well as two wrapped gifts and birthday cake. It was really helpful because she played with the toys non stop until it was time for the laughing gas. They gave her a baby doll and a tea set. I loved watching her feed her little baby with a spoon!

She never shed a tear the whole time, even with the anesthetic mask on and doctors in her face. She was incredible. It's been three days since the shot and her swelling is probably about 80% gone. I'm praying for a total recovery...

...now that you're informed, feel free to jump to the next post for all the happy birthday fun!!

life in general: a top ten

There is so much to update since Thanksgiving that I feel overwhelmed. This has been an eventful time. With lots of friends and family visits, Christmas excitement and thrills, health issues (another post needed here) and just general cuteness, there doesn't seem time to sit down and recount it all. So, in the interest of capturing a glimpse, I'll settle for a quick top ten of this particular season with the kids. Here are a few of my favorite things:

1. Josie's choice to whisper most everything since she's constantly corrected for screaming when she's unhappy.

2. Josie's quick sign language blown kiss when she screams "NOOOO!" and is quickly encouraged to say "No, thank you." It's a gesture that softens the piercing, shrill rejection she started with.

3. Simon's increased openness and communication...instead of just mysteriously rejecting something, he has started to explain why he doesn't like it or doesn't want to do something...for example, tonight he told me he didn't want to wear a certain pajama shirt because it "tickles." (There was a long tag that needed to be cut away.)

4. Ella's smarty pants-ness. She is just dang smart. And so easy to teach! I love that she loves learning. She really does impress me and I feel blessed just knowing her!

5. Ella's perceptiveness and awareness of others. And honesty. Honesty like I've never, ever seen before. It's very personally challenging and inspiring.

6. Simon's smile and laughter. It melts a mother's heart. He has the sweetest little teeth too and likes to make a game out of brushing his teeth. He likes to play hard to get!

7. Josie's "angel hair." A lot of people like to make fun of her "mullet" but I couldn't cut it for anything! It's thin on top for sure, but it's beautifully blonde, so soft, and it almost sparkles like it's gold spun! It's so pretty just after a bath when there are soft ringlets around the nape of her neck.

8. Independence. It's really cool to see the kids doing things for themselves. Ella has become the designated bathroom cleaner. She likes doing it and is fairly thorough. She also likes peeling her own kiwi and carrots. Simon always dresses himself in the best outfits. Every morning he asks if it's cold outside in order to decide which sleeve length is appropriate. This morning he wore three shirts! Josie is so great about throwing her own trash away and is a great picker upper! She also loves brushing her own teeth and trying to flush the toilet for us.

9. Cozy homeness. As the kids were all snuggled in our bed to read books at bedtime tonight, I was struck by how deeply satisfying it is to create a space that is comfortable, warm, inviting and secure. They were snuggly under the blankets, with their books and their pillows and I pondered at how innate this desire is—as a mom and as a woman—to create a nest for her family. It's something I have struggled to balance...wanting to create something lovely while avoiding finding my worth in possessions. But I think the desire is a pure one that God puts in our hearts, in order to create a place where peace, security and predictability can be found.

10. Favorites. I love that Simon finally has a favorite meal...fried rice jumbalaya or chickpea sausage stew. He has been hard to peg on that one. Josie has a favorite blankie now that she must nuzzle up against when trying to bridge the gap between awake and asleep just after a nap. Ella has lots of favorites and is an open book....one of her new favorite movies is "It's a Wonderful Life" with Jimmy Stewart. We went to see it late one evening just before Christmas at The Hi-Pointe theater. What it treat it was and she's still talking about the story!

It's a bit sad that I haven't chronicled more of this really sweet, but sometimes very challenging, time in our lives. There have been some really great moments and all is very well as far has the happiness curve in the day in and day out. However, we are facing some stuff we've not faced before and are doing our best to keep our heads about us. The kids are so great and I am aware, now more often than ever, at what a gift my life is. Being their mom, and Bryan's wife, is more rewarding than anything I've ever done. Remind me of this post when my attitude stinks!

thanksgiving and other merry making

Our Thanksgiving holiday always involves time with my dad and siblings. For the past four or five years, they have traveled to be with us at our place and we share a huge feast, play games, visit some sort of local spot of interest like the City Museum, Magic House, Powder Valley, or a local park depending on the weather. This year, we mainly focused on spending time together at the house or at the hotel where Dad, Cimi and the kids stayed. Simon and Ella stuck very close to my little sister Keely who is nearly 11. She entertains them and makes life extremely fun for the few days they are here. Every year, I feel like our time together gets more enjoyable and it's always sad when they all go back home.

This year we embarked on a new undertaking that I secretly hope will become a tradition. I had an itch to hang Christmas lights (which I have only done once and I believe it was during some serious nesting impulses). My older brother Josh seemed very receptive to the idea of helping me. One encouraging word was all I needed to move forward! He worked very hard to hang the lights and climbed all over the porch like a lemur (descriptive comparison drawn by Bryan.) Once Dad and my stepmom, Cimi arrived with the kids, they helped out by running to Big Lots for an extra extension cord. They were so excited to contribute to the merriment, they returned with a couple of lawn ornaments. I have never owned a lawn ornament before. The decorating began to take on a life of it's own, but I have to say, I am drawn into the cheer of it all! I'm very excited to drive up to our house and see the lights glimmering in the dark from down the street.

Let the holiday merriment ensue!

reading, studying, bathing and celebrating

As usual, I have fallen behind in keeping track of all the little milestones and sweet sayings around here. But I don't feel too bad as I've been busy "living life" with these guys. Sometimes getting on my computer feels like more of a drain than productive and helpful. But there are a few notables so I thought I'd pause a moment to scratch them down.

I think I can make the statement that Simon is really reading now. He has been sounding out words here and there and chiming in when I read with him when he recognizes a word or when I push for him to figure it out. He has always liked letters, loves writing words and drawing pictures, but he does get frustrated if he feels like he's not succeeding. So I thought it might be helpful to get him some super early readers that seem less daunting than some of the "I Can Read Books" we have in our library. I purchased the "Bob Books" from one of his school's book orders and he officially began reading them on his own yesterday. He was so thrilled that he stayed up with the light on to read after I'd tucked him in. I am so proud of him and very excited for where this takes him!!

Ella's homeschooling is going well. We have our moments of difficulty, which I notice happen more if we aren't prompt in getting on the ball early in the morning. The more she gets in play mode, the more difficult it is to focus and the day takes longer. But we feel very productive and really get things done efficiently if we start right after breakfast. She is excelling and I have seen so much growth in her confidence as a person and her self expression. Some of that may just be in maturing as she ages, but I have to believe that meeting her needs as she has expressed them has contributed to some of her growth. She loves all the reading and we've finished quite a few books already. She is writing in cursive now and is really quite proficient at it. She likes science and our world history is fascinating. We're learning about Ancient Egypt now and had a field trip to the art museum to see the mummies and Egyptian art. I dare say, I am seriously loving homeschool and the enjoyment, closeness and quality time it fosters!

Josie's vocabulary is expanding and she's successfully repeating words back to us quite a bit now. She's "sugar and spice" as we've always said...the sweetest, most affectionate child I've ever known, but very expressive when she's irritated. She screams to show she's mad and sometimes she screams to show she's thrilled! She's growing so much and is starting to grow out of some of the things that can be so difficult with little ones, like requiring being held for an hour before finally falling asleep at night. We're getting past some of those more "intensive" things with her and she is capable of doing lots of things, but she's still our baby!

Last night during bath time, I was finishing up with Josie when Simon decided to jump in the tub as well. Josie was all washed and rinsed and playing in the water and Simon and I commenced in talking about his fifth birthday plans. I was engrossed in our conversation and hadn't noticed that Josie had gotten quiet and was looking down at something next to her in the water. At the angle I was sitting at, I couldn't see what she was looking at and continued talking until I finally got curious about what she was studying. I sat up and looked next to her to see a small turd floating in the water. She seemed confused at what it was and had been studying it trying to decide if it was friend or foe. As soon as I jumped up with alarm and said, "Oh my GOSH!" she decided it must be foe! She began crying in desperation and panic. I pulled her out and wrapped her up (Simon had already made his exit) and she shivered with nervousness and fear. After the inconvenient impromptu scrubbing of the bathtub while my two youngest waited to be re-bathed, I really couldn't get annoyed or frustrated. It was all too hilariously entertaining. Simon was a champ. I couldn't believe he didn't freak out about sitting in Josie's poo water. But he laughed right along with me. Once I ran the clean bath and Simon got back in, Josie was still afraid. She shook her head emphatically saying, "nuh-uh" multiple times. But I stuck to my guns and she got her second bath. She came around eventually with no more tears shed.

Oh my. Such an event.

Tomorrow is our eleventh anniversary. Tucking Ella in tonight, I told her how excited I was to go out to dinner to celebrate at a fun restaurant (we're doing a family date for this one...Bryan and I had a big Mexican vacation all last week to celebrate year 10-11). Ella said, "Oh no! I'm such a ding dong! I forgot to make you a present!" to which I replied, "YOU are my present, and Josie and Simon too." She added, "And Dad. He's absolutely your BEST present."

She is so right. I couldn't be more satisfied with a life if I had written it myself.

taking credit

Whenever we go on a trip of any kind, Ella is known to "pack a bag." Even on a trip to Target or to the grocery store, she has to have some kind of little something to entertain herself like a book or activity of some sort. Sometimes it's a pain because the unpacking doesn't always happen AFTER the trip so there are often shoulder bags full of books, crayons and toys at various spots in the house.

Late this afternoon, Bryan decided it would be a fun treat to take the kids on a spontaneous camping trip just for tonight. Ella was thrilled and immediately commenced to packing her bag. I packed for Simon and gathered all the linens and as the time to depart neared, I racked my brain for things we may be forgetting.

Me: Ella, did you get your boots?
E: Yes, and Simon's too.
Me: What about socks...I think you'll need socks with those because it will get quite a bit colder this evening.
E: Yes! I got TWO PAIRS!
Me: Wow Ella, you thought of everything! You don't even need a mom!
E: Yes I do. If it weren't for you, I wouldn't have learned any of this stuff.

Credit is nice, though, I think she's done just fine on her own. She's a great kid.

 In the tent

night at the carnival

Today was family day and what a great day we had together! We started with a lazy breakfast, coffee and cartoons, then dressed ourselves for a walk in the woods. We visited Powder Valley which is a favorite place of ours for walking because the path is a "doable" distance for each of us, fully shaded, brimming with woodland creature like deer who are very used to people in their space, and lots of spots for walking across logs, skipping stones over creeks and stamping over wooden footbridges. We spent most of our time skipping stones and getting dirty.

After lunch we rested and then the kids did a 20 minute workout dvd with me (this point deserves a post all to itself...what a sight to see the kids engaged in this activity, with me huffing and puffing and them using cans for weights.) Then we needed more rest and baths.

In early evening, we visited a small carnival close by our neighborhood. It was just the sort of carnival I grew up with...very small town, about five large rides and lots of smells of corndogs, funnel cake and popcorn. Our kids are very wary of carnivals and rides in general and were squeamish at first at the thought of riding ANYTHING. But I talked them into a small inflatable obstacle course, knowing it would warm them up and wouldn't frighten them (at least not after they gave their tickets to the strange lady at the entrance). They took their time and seemed a bit more secure by the end of it. The inflatable served as a great primer and got them acclimated to the excitement that is the carnival.

Next I was able to get them to agree to riding a more legit ride called "The Frog Hopper." Basically, it was a row of seats you get strapped into and then slowly hoisted up and dropped down quickly so that your stomach ends up in your esophagus. I promised to ride it with them so they reluctantly boarded the ride, one on either side of me. We all held hands and screamed as the seats seemed to drop out from under us for a two second free fall. They loved it after the first couple of jolts and were begging to do it again by the end!

Unfortunately, the ferris wheel wasn't working which was a huge disappointment since it was the only grown up ride I could get the kids excited for. So we spent the remainder of our tickets on the frog hopper, the baby cars that drive in a circle and the inflatable mega slide. At the end, Simon piped up that he wanted to ride on the one that flipped upside down. Shocked, I questioned his statement. And he was serious. Even though we were out of tickets, I told Bryan I thought, if he was willing to take a risk, I wanted to jump on it! (Simon is characteristically shy and reserved and slow to draw attention to himself. His teacher last year described him as "careful and observant.") So, Daddy took the girls to get a snow cone while Simon and I got tickets for the upside down ride (four "cages" on two parallel pendulums that swing back and forth gathering momentum till you flip upside down and do a full 360° flip around.)

As we stood in line, we watched the people riding, screaming and some younger ones crying. I thought for sure he'd want to back out as I, myself, began to get a nervous stomach. I asked him, "Simon? Are you SURE you want to ride this ride?" He nodded excitedly, clenching his three tickets and smiling. He said, "I might scream but I won't be scared!" So we waited our turn. As the ride slowed to a halt and the passengers deboarded, the carnie worker approached us at the front of the line and said, "Its gonna be a while. I had a puker." I thought he meant he had to go throw up, but I figured out as he poured buckets of water in one of the cages it actually meant that one of the passengers we couldn't see had thrown up during the ride. Geeeee-Rooossss. After dousing the thing with water, he sent the ride spinning once on empty to rid the seats of ghastly watered down vomit. I began to get even more queasy at the thought of any of these droplets landing on me while we spun through the air and thanked God that I hadn't had any dinner yet. Simon's courage didn't waver. We boarded the ride and buckled in.

Soon we were waving slowly, backward and forward through the air, the large grin still plastered across Simon's face. He laughed nervously and kept his little hand under mine as we grasped the lap bar. It didn't take long to gather speed and as we looped up, it felt as though we were hanging in mid air. Our bodies came up out of our seats and rested on the lap bar and we both freaked out. His eyes were wide and his voice was panicky as he cried out, "MOM! MOM!" I didn't look forward but kept my face fixed on him and demanded he look into my eyes as I reassured him we were alright. (I didn't feel alright...it was seriously scary and I felt like I might throw up too while at the same time wanting to shriek out for my own mother!) The ride felt like an eternity. He never cried, but he seemed in a wide eyed, fixated trance and wouldn't take his eyes off the spinning landscape in order to gain security in my face. As the flipping ceased and we began the slow rocking to a full stop, he turned to finally face me and relaxed. The smile returned and he was proud of himself.

As we made the trek across the pavement to join the rest of our family on the other side of the observation fence, we felt bonded...like we'd won a battle together. I was proud of my little guy. Only four years old and willing to fight a giant! I'm wondering what chapter of courageous exploits this boy may have ahead.

Simon is my little hero today. Oh how I love that boy.