my boy shines

Oh, where to begin? Today was Day 1 of Bryan's 8-day trip to the UK. These trips are ones that I tend to manage well by staying busy with friends or projects around the house, taking it day by day without counting down the days lest the time pass too slowly. But saying goodbye to my husband today was the saddest it's ever been before. And I've been one breath away from a teary breakdown all day. It probably has something to do with the way the evening panned out, and thus begins the blog entry for today.

A couple of days ago, Simon woke up with a seal-like, barking cough. Nothing nagging or persistent, just a bark here and there and I thought, "Oh great. Another one of his croupy spells might develop out of this seemingly harmless cough." Seems that whenever Simon gets a cold of any kind, it develops into a horrible chest congestion immediately and I spend a couple of restless nights with the baby monitor turned up too high or rousing myself from bed to jack up the hot water in the shower, creating a sauna for his poor little lungs to gain relief. Most often, I use the steamy shower trick or brisk outdoor air exposure at 2 a.m. or whatever gets us through. And then he's better in a couple of days and is no worse for the wear. But today struck me a little different. We went for a short walk to get out into the mild weather and hadn't gone far when I noticed Simon's breathing was extremely loud and labored. He was definitely wheezing like an asthmatic. But he never seemed uncomfortable or upset and he didn't want me to carry him. We stopped by a friends house and had a little rest and I thought his breathing would calm down if we stopped moving for a while. But it didn't seem to change much and I finally called our doctor.

Calling the doctor is annoying to me because it usually ends up being a case where the think they need to see him and then they offer to prescribe an antibiotic or whatever, but it's almost always just a virus that needs to run it's course. So I don't know exactly what I was looking for when I called at 3:30 in the afternoon. When the nurse heard the sound of my son barking from across the room, she said she wanted me to bring him in. Knowing I couldn't make it out to that part of town before closing time in the middle of traffic, I made an appointment for the next morning but she advised me that if he got any worse throughout the night, I should take him to the ER! Wanting to avoid that option at any cost, (a trip to the ER costs us $200!!) I decided to take him into the clinic at Walgreens. They listened to his lungs and said that he was too congested for them to treat so they sent us down to the closest urgent care clinic. Simon saw the doc there and was diagnosed some antibiotics for bronchitis and a steroid for inflammation in his lungs. The doc also suggested that the reccurence of this "croup" could be caused by an environmental factor in our home like mold or furnace filters not being regularly changed. (As a side note, the very thought of this possibility sent every OCD tendency in me ablaze and had me talking myself down from the ledge...but enough about me.)

Of course, the trauma didn't end there as we still had to make a trip to ANOTHER Walgreens to pick up the prescriptions that the doctor said he faxed over ahead of us which, not surprisingly, they had no record of and didn't even have Simon in their computer. So, we burned another half hour while they filled the scripts and then headed back to the store to buy a warm mist humidifier and such. By the time we got home, it was bedtime...all my plans to have a fun, relaxed evening with my kids, watching a movie and eating popcorn happily together were awash in medical, viral, stressful drama. After a hot shower sauna in our bathroom, the kids are all tucked cozily in their beds, sleeping soundly and I can't help but ask God, "Why does all this happen the moment my husband boards a plane flying across an ocean? What is it I need to learn here?" Well, my first answer is a pragmatic one...there is indeed mold growing in a dark corner of our basement. And I did learn how to change the filter in our furnace. The more spiritual answer, I'm sure, will come at a later date when I'm not so easily moved to a crying jag.

BUT...the real reason I meant to enter this post is to brag on my son. The whole time, from the Walgreens walk in clinic to the Urgent Care, to the drive thru dinner to the multiple stops at Walgreens, to the shower sauna...he was a perfect gem. He seemed thrilled to be on his own. It was time spent, just the two of us...I don't know if that has EVER happened before. He seemed so grown up and proud of himself. He followed every direction the doctor or nurse gave and seemed eager to please. And everyone was charmed by his sweet nature. This kid has stolen my heart. One thing I have taken away from this day is that my boy deserves some time just for him, so that he can shine. And shine he does.